The older I get,
the more I understand
how important it is
to live a life most
people don't understand.
I once read a book by Joseph Campbell where he said 'The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are.' And the older I get, the more clearly I can see this.
Our society wants to categorize us. Stereotype us. Simplify our existence for what it believes to be the stake for it's survival. To give every single person a pre-determined outcome before he or she has a chance to find it for themselves. To send everyone to school the same way. To follow relationships the same way. To chase after jobs and money instead of dreams and individual ideas. And well, I say hell to the nah to all of that.
Your soul deserves searching. And deserves attention. Because only in that quest can we ever find and work on our everyday happiness. And when we find it, we are then contributing to the world the best within us. Our best talents, thoughts, hopes, dreams, and can even build healthier relationships with the people around us thus making the world we live in a better place to be.
It shouldn't matter so much if you don't fit in somewhere. Because I've lived my whole life never really fitting in anywhere. And that's ok. I've never really needed to. Because despite it, I can still make friends. I can still love. And I can still be real and true and open to others who are different than me - because literally everybody is. It's literally impossible for any 2 people to be the same.
People told me even before being a mom that driving a motorcycle around is stupid and reckless. And while there is definitely some truth in the reckless, it all goes down to the person driving the thing for the stupid.
But when you become a parent, there seems to be this silenced and accepted rule in our society that you have to hang everything else up in your life and say no more to any chance, danger, or new things that drive you for the sake of being there for your child.
So when I started talking about wanting to buy a motorcycle - which has been a thing through my whole 20's - people in my life around me became a lot more vocal against it now that I was a mom. Telling me that I had responsibilites to my son. That somehow my riding a bike, going traveling with him, or even working at all was doing a disservice to my son by not being there for him 24/7.
But, I have a question for those of you wanting to say that to me as you are reading this.
What kind of disservice are you doing to yourself and your children by never allowing yourself to be everything you want in this life?
By pushing your boundaries and showing your children that they too can be and do anything they want to do?
Because, you not doing what you want for yourself and for your family will naturally take it's toll on you over the years. And as you grow older, bitterness sets in from never achieving much of what you set out for. Then unhappiness sets in if it isn't there already. And close mindedness inevitably does as well.
And what is that showing to your children?
Our children learn most by example from the people in their lives. And if I want Leo to be a brave adult, confident in his abilities, smart, and more than capable to be anything he wants... it's MY job as his mother to show him how to do that. To be those qualities and give him the belief that he is all of those things too. To me, that's our ultimate gift to our children.
So instead of changing my entire life and person for Leo, I would rather take the approach to live life as true to who I always have been and just take him along for the ride instead.
Because I think he'll learn a lot more that way and be a more than capable adult than if I decided to hide who I was and embrace what society is trying to make me be.
Even if it might be a little more reckless to ride around on motorcycles, jump out of airplanes, or travel the world.. I can still be smart about it and play the game of life too.
So let's all drop this all or nothing attitude. Embrace what makes us different as individuals. And play the hell out of the tunes of our minds to give the world a little more uniqueness than what was there before.
Because the world deserves it.
Every person around you deserves it.
But you deserve it most.
A super special thank you to my husband Paul for understanding this part of me and embracing it. He bought me this motorcycle, a Suzuki TU250x, for our 10th wedding anniversary in February and I honestly cannot express how much it's a dream come true. Gotta still fix this beauty up and make her road worthy which will be my next project this summer <3 and hopefully will be finally tackling getting my license and mastering this skillset I started and never finished when I was just 19.
So here's to new adventures and always listening to the call of the open road whose lure never seems to fade.